She Felt In Her Body
When Jesus had crossed again in the boat to the other side, a great crowd gathered around him; and he was by the sea. Then one of the leaders of the synagogue named Jairus came and, when he saw him, fell at his feet and begged him repeatedly, "My little daughter is at the point of death. Come and lay your hands on her, so that she may be made well, and live."
So he went with him. And a large crowd followed him and pressed in on him.
Now there was a woman who had been suffering from hemorrhages for twelve years. She had endured much under many physicians, and had spent all that she had; and she was no better, but rather grew worse. She had heard about Jesus, and came up behind him in the crowd and touched his cloak, for she said, "If I but touch his clothes, I will be made well."
Immediately her hemorrhage stopped; and she felt in her body that she was healed of her disease.
Immediately aware that power had gone forth from him, Jesus turned about in the crowd and said, "Who touched my clothes?" And his disciples said to him, "You see the crowd pressing in on you; how can you say, 'Who touched me?'"
He looked all around to see who had done it.
But the woman, knowing what had happened to her, came in fear and trembling, fell down before him, and told him the whole truth. He said to her, "Daughter, your faith has made you well; go in peace, and be healed of your disease."
While he was still speaking, some people came from the leader's house to say, "Your daughter is dead. Why trouble the teacher any further?" But overhearing what they said, Jesus said to the leader of the synagogue, "Do not fear, only believe."
He allowed no one to follow him except Peter, James, and John, the brother of James. When they came to the house of the leader of the synagogue, he saw a commotion, people weeping and wailing loudly.
When he had entered, he said to them, "Why do you make a commotion and weep? The child is not dead but sleeping." And they laughed at him. Then he put them all outside, and took the child's father and mother and those who were with him, and went in where the child was.
He took her by the hand and said to her, "Talitha cum," which means, "Little girl, get up!"
And immediately the girl got up and began to walk about (she was twelve years of age). At this they were overcome with amazement. He strictly ordered them that no one should know this, and told them to give her something to eat.
Mark 5:21-43
This passage from Mark is a complex text.
On the one hand, it is a beautiful story of the amazing healing powers of Jesus.
And on the other, it has done much harm to people who have believed there must be something wrong with them - that their faith is not strong enough - if they or their loved ones aren’t healed.
There is also the complexity around how we interpret this passage and what it says about our own faith.
There are people who take the passage literally. Jesus brought the girl back from the dead. It’s in the Bible, the Bible is inerrant, I must not question it. And to interpret the Bible in any other way is heretical - not Christian.
Then there are those who say, this is just a story. It’s not meant to be taken literally. And to do so insults my intelligence. If this is what I have to believe to be Christian...then count me out.
Christians have been arguing about Biblical interpretation ever since there was a Bible. The bible itself contains complexity.
For example - We have four different Gospel stories. Three of them - Matthew, Mark, and Luke - are basically 3 versions of the same story. Mark is believed to be the primary story and Matthew and Luke add more complexity to the Mark story. Yet some Christians want to ignore the complexity and turn the Bible into a manual of do’s and don’ts for how to live a good faithful life.
As human beings, we are hard wired to not like complexity.
New research in trauma says our bodies are designed to organize around 3 things: safety, belonging and dignity.
So we learn patterns that our bodies can put on automatic responses to help us meet these needs and free up our thinking brains for things like finding food.
For example - We all know the old adage about touching a hot stove. Our bodies know to automatically pull back instantly. All day long we are scanning our environment and making assessments about what will and won’t keep us safe. The more we can automate this process - the more space we have for cognitive thought.
The problem is many of our automatic responses were developed and learned when we were children and more vulnerable than we are as adults - yet these child size automatic responses stayed in our body’s tissues and nervous system.
These automatic reactions may be what Paul was referring to in Romans 7 verse 15 when he says. “I do not understand my own actions. For I do not do what I want, but I do the very thing I hate.”
I wonder if he is talking about when he responds with anger, aggression and violence - behaviors he thought he left behind when he started following the peaceful and loving ways of Jesus.
It takes a lot of courage to own up to the ways in which we fall short. Especially when we don’t understand why we react the way we do.
Or maybe we don’t like how we react.
My mom often says this about watching the news. She doesn’t do it because…. it makes her so angry and she doesn’t like how it feels to be so angry so she just avoids the news all together and doesn’t want to engage in any conversations that might bring up strong emotions.
Which would be fine, if my mom was the only person who did this.
But When a whole bunch of people do this - ignore getting involved in current events because they want to avoid strong emotions and being uncomfortable - this allows harm to go unchallenged.
Fortunately there is a spiritual practice we can do that helps us expand our capacity to hold complexity and to be uncomfortable.
It is a breath prayer.
It is simply breathing in and out through your nose and all the down in your belly at a slow rhythmic pace while saying to yourself the prayer:
“Welcome Holy Spirit” on the inhale and “Hold All with Compassion” on the exhale.
I invite you to practice it with me now.
I will lead you in the prayer and say the words.
We will repeat the prayer 7 times as according to the research, that is about how many rounds it takes to settle our nervous system.
Let’s begin by just practicing breathing in and out through your nose. Some of us may not be able to do this and that’s fine.
I am giving you the optimal practice - you listen to your body and do what works for you today.
I invite you now to place your hands on your sides and on your next inhale, see if you can get your body to expand as the lower portion of your lungs fill with air. Again - this may not be a way of breathing you are used to as many of us have been shaped to take shallow chest breaths so just do the best you can.
Now we will elongate the breath with the words of the prayer and as we do, I invite you to use your hands in a way that symbolizes on the outside the expansion that is happening on the inside
inhale “Welcome Holy Spirit”
exhale “Hold all with Compassion”
Repeat 6 times
Amen
I teach this prayer to people everytime I speak on ending gun violence because talking about gun violence can be very activating to people’s automatic response nervous system.
I often hear from concerned pastors and others in the church about the fear that is in their congregation around talking about gun violence. This is a practice that can help us engage in difficult conversations as we are welcoming not only the holy spirit but we are also welcoming the uncomfortable sensations that may be happening in our bodies that we want to avoid and it teaches us to hold all that discomfort with compassion.
You can do this prayer anywhere and at anytime.
I encourage you to practice it and use it when you feel activated or uncomfortable.
Our desire to avoid our own uncomfortable feelings and emotions is the source of violence.
That’s what happened to Jesus.
He was pointing out to the religious authorities how their actions were not aligned with the faith they professed and rather than hear what he had to say, sit with the uncomfortableness, admit their wrongdoing and repent
They killed him.
It’s what Rene Girard calls creating a scapegoat. A scapegoat allows us to project our uncomfortable feelings and blame something or someone outside ourselves for them and then think we will feel better when we eliminate the source of our uncomfortableness.
One current event that is bringing lots of uncomfortable feelings is the discussion around teaching critical race theory.
This week has been particularly volatile as the Chairman of the Joint Chiefs of Staff, General Mark Milley said in a House Committee Meeting that he is in favor of learning more about Critical Race Theory as he believes it is important that the people who serve in the military are open-minded and widely read.
He went on to say and I quote: “I personally find it offensive that we are accusing the United States military, our general officers, our commissioned, non-commissioned officers of being quote woke or something else because we’re studying some theories that are out there. I’ve read Karl Marx. I’ve read Lenin. That doesn’t make me a communist. So what is wrong with understanding, having some situational understanding about the country for which we are here to defend?”
So what is going on - why is there such a strong reaction to learning or is it just because this particular learning is about race?
And talking about race and racism is something that activates us and makes us uncomfortable.
David Gushee, a writer for the Baptist News Global, released an article on Friday titled White hysteria, Critical Race Theory, and eyes that dare not see.
In the article he proposed that a significant portion of the white population in the United States simply cannot face the vicious history and ongoing reality of white racism in this country. That to do so, would mean confronting the lies we have told for 100s of years about ourselves - about our goodness.
Gushee says - “We don’t wish to just retain our supremacy but we also want to retain our innocence. It is the challenging of our innocence that so outrages us.”
I propose that outrage is our body’s automatic response when we feel a treat to our safety, belonging and dignity.
But we don’t have to be victims of our automatic responses.
When we intentionally practice expanding our capacity to be uncomfortable, to learn how to hold complex issues - like how we can be both a good loving person and…... benefit and be part of a system of tremendous harm..
We can be agents of change.
We can live into our calling as followers of Jesus to be co-creators with God in making the kingdom of heaven manifest here on earth.
When we change ourselves and gain some control over our automatic responses through practices like the breath prayer….. we no longer do the things we don’t want to do like Paul…..
Instead we create some space that opens us to the Spirit and to new possibilities. We can better take actions that more closely align with our values.
As you know, I serve as the Gun Violence Prevention Ministry coordinator with the Presbyterian Peace Fellowship. It is my role to encourage and equip individuals and congregations in becoming informed and active in ending gun violence.
Most people think we had a break from gun violence last year because it didn’t occupy our daily news.
We didn’t.
More people died last year by a gun, around 40,000, than in any of the previous 20 years. The evidence is clear - where there are more guns - there is more gun violence and Last year was a record breaking year for gun sales.
It is estimated 23 million guns were sold last year alone.
That’s a lot of guns and the number one reason given for purchasing a gun is self defense.
People are afraid.
Our safety, belonging and dignity feel under attack.
It is imperative now more than ever in my lifetime, that we practice settling our nervous system and expanding our capacity to hold complexity and the uncomfortableness that comes with it.
That’s how we live into our baptismal promises of turning away from evil and towards God.
Amen.
Sources:
General Milley’s comments.
David Gushee, White hysteria, Critical Race Theory, and eyes that dare not see.